We have just celebrated one of the most significant dates on the Christian calendar – but how many of us went to church over Christmas?
According to results from the last Census, 25 per cent of the UK population does not consider itself to have any religion.
With increasing numbers of people living without organised religion, more people are choosing to have a non-religious ceremony to mark milestone events such as weddings, civil partnerships, baby namings and funerals.
Val Turner is one of four humanist celebrants in the Bradford district. They are affiliated to the British Humanist Association, representing “non-religious people who seek to live ethical and fulfilling lives on the basis of reason and humanity”.
Founded in 1896, the BHA has more than 28,000 supporters, including more than 300 celebrants and the All Party Parliamentary Humanist Group, which offers a humanist perspective in public debate.
Accredited celebrants conduct non-religious ceremonies attended by more than 250,000 people each year.
Val says she has been a humanist since her teens, although she didn’t really know it at the time.
“It was only when I read about it years later that everything fell into place,” she says. “I wasn’t religious but at the same time I didn’t think you had to go to church to be a good person.”
Val decided to train as a celebrant after attending the humanist funeral of a friend. “It was very personal, warm and dignified. I thought I’d like to do something like that for other people,” she says.
She applied to be a celebrant and underwent a rigorous training procedure.
“It involved writing scripts, talking and listening to people, and learning how to deal sensitively with things like family visits at difficult times,” says Val, who has been performing funerals for two years and weddings, partnerships and baby namings for a year.
As a humanist, Val believes she only has one life and it’s important to live the best way she can. She believes that while science has the answers, we create our own meaning of life.
“I try to live my life in a positive way and make the world a better place. I believe individual responsibility, social co-operation and mutual respect are good principles to live by,” she says.
“Just because you don’t believe in an afterlife doesn’t mean you can’t appreciate the beauty of the life we have.
“There are all sorts of reasons why people aren’t religious. People lead busy lives and look for meaning in other things.”
Val works closely with families to make ceremonies personal. “With funerals, we talk about what kind of person the deceased was, not just what they achieved,” she says.
“There’s a structure to funerals but each one is unique to that person. It’s a commital back to the elements, ending with an uplifting tone. It’s about acknowledging the deceased and celebrating their life.
“Some people have religious funerals even though they weren’t religious in life, because they don’t know there’s another option.”
There are no hymns or prayers at a humanist ceremony, but family and friends can give readings and play music.
“With weddings, I write a script then the couple have an input. It goes backwards and forwards between us until they’re happy with it. They can write their own vows and promises,” says Val.
While she isn’t legally allowed to marry couples in England – although she can in Scotland – Val can hold a celebratory ceremony following a registry office wedding.
“I’ve done them in places like Fountains Abbey and village halls, and baby-naming ceremonies in people’s gardens and homes. It’s very flexible,” she says.
Val, from Heaton, started out working in local government then industry and sales, then went to university in later life and became a lecturer in literacy and numeracy at Bradford College.
Now retired, she says her work background helps in her role as a celebrant. “I have good listening skills and the practical, emotional and organisational skills needed to conduct sensitive, meaningful ceremonies. I have a counselling qualification too,” she says.
Val is part of a team of humanist celebrants covering West Yorkshire. The others covering the Bradford district are David Jennings, Dawn Thewlis and Janice Thornton.
For more about humanist ceremonies, contact Val Turner on 07507 136600 or visit humanism.org.uk.
