There were tears, there was screaming, there were slaps. No, I'm not talking about another day looking after Toddler, but the pulsating events in Albert Square that kept us on the edge of our seats.

Bianca has gone and a nation breathes easy. Or does it?

In a week when marriage is in the news (again) and a baby was born outside the womb and Zoe Ball said she was having a break from her high-flying job to plan for a baby, we were to witness the break-up of a soap marriage.

I know that soaps are not deemed intellectually stimulating. I know they are seen as the poor relation of theatre and real acting, but I think that there is a lot that we can learn.

For example, to wear waterproof mascara whenever some major indiscretion is about to be revealed. That was the case with flame-haired temptress, er, Bianca Butcher (such an attractive name) who saw the proverbial hit the fan when the secret of her torrid affair with desperate Dan was revealed to all - as usual in the packed Vic.

We were treated to five nights of Eastenders- which sparked off protests from sensible people who said that it was a travesty. It was diabolical. How I agreed. Eastenders should be on every night of every week.

And personally I will be so sad to see the back of my favourite soap character.

How I loved the way Bi walked with her shoulders slouched and her pony tail flapping behind. After all her crying and the tears and the endless "Ah'm reeally sorreeee, Mum/Ricky/Pat/Dan/Robbie/Sonya/Liam/Wellard, she no doubt needs a long rest.

The tears flowed as Beeyanker, as she is known by Rickai put baby Liam on the train and then begged Rickai to come with them to Manchester. I was more fearful of the train going off with the baby on board than anything else but it was the crucial question that stuck: " Am I a compromise, am I what you really want?" Alas, the answer was no. Thousand of Biancas who are with Rickys fleetingly toyed with the idea of running off to Manchester.

Actress Patsy Palmer says that she is going to spend more time at home with her son.

And hot on the heels of her departure came the news that gangly blond Zoe Ball is going to go off and have a family.

This, of course, set off a spark of protests from other working women who said that it's all right for Zoe to take the high moral ground and say that she wants to stay home and look after a baby, but she is married to a man with £7 million in the bank.

The stay at home and look after the kids v go out to work question is one that always rears its head, and with the news that a baby has miraculously survived outside the womb, people are asking whether men should be allowed to have babies.

Oh dear. Men should really learn the important things before leaping to the conclusion that they would make good mums. For example, letting us watch Eastenders five nights a week, getting used to excruciating pain, and wearing waterproof mascara.

Converted for the new archive on 30 June 2000. Some images and formatting may have been lost in the conversion.