'I just can't cope'

We’ve asked the experts for advice on how best to deal with common problems that can be distressing, demoralising or worrying:

I dread occasions like Valentine's Day because I’m plagued by unsightly and embarrassing cold sores. It’s really affecting my efforts to date and I can’t cope. What can I do?

Marian Nicholson from the Herpes Viruses Association says: “Don’t be over-sensitive about your cold sores – they’ll always seem bigger to you than anyone else. Instead, try to identify the triggers that provoke a cold sore so you can try and prevent them. For some people it’s lack of sleep, alcohol, a poor diet, or sunlight.

A recent survey by online skin care company Skin Shop revealed that 27 per cent of sufferers felt the embarrassment of a cold sore had ruined at least one Valentine celebration.

Marian points out that the herpes simplex virus that causes cold sores is extremely common – around seven out of ten people in England alone – carry it.

“Most are unaware they have it as it may lie dormant and they never notice any symptoms, and only a quarter of people get the intermittent outbreak of a cold sore on the soft skin around the lips, mouth or nose area.”

The virus is contracted from kissing, but can only be passed on when a cold sore is present, and cannot be caught through sharing cups, cutlery, or towels.

Marian says some products, such as Rinstead Adult Gel, Lypsyl Cold Sore Gel and Anbesol Adult Gel, can numb the skin and may help prevent a cold sore developing.

You could also try a natural remedy such as Liquorice Balm, £7.99 for 30g (0871 8719975/skinshop.co.uk); or new treatment Cymex Ultra, £4.88 (cymex.co.uk).

* For more information, visit herpes.org.uk/coldsores.html or call 0845 123 2305.

Nowadays I spend every night awake tossing and turning with my head full of worries about the credit crunch. Then I’m so tired in the day I struggle to cope. What can I do?

Leading sleep expert Dr Chris Idzikowski says it’s essential to confront your problems.

“If you are having bad dreams, ask yourself what is causing them,” he says.

“Write down your worries on a piece of paper and keep it next to the bed and this will help stop you mentally churning them endlessly around.

“Resolve to put them aside while you rest and deal with them in the morning.”

He also advises establishing a healthy sleep routine. Have a bath an hour before your bedtime have a bath, listen to soothing music, avoid alcohol and the stimulation of television, and try to go to bed at the same time each night.

A survey of 4,000 Britons by nocturnal muscle cramp treatment Crampex revealed that people are currently waking up on average three times a night, and one in four blames money worries on bad dreams.

* For sleep advice, visit goodsleepadvice.com.

I’ve recently developed a buzzing, ringing sound in my ears that won’t go away, and it’s driving me mad. I can’t cope with it – what can I do?

Consultant audiological scientist David Baguley is professional adviser to the British Tinnitus Association.

“You may have tinnitus, which is a sensation of a sound in the ear, usually a ringing noise, although it can be high-pitched whistling or buzzing or hissing,” he says.

“It can be very distressing and affect sleep, concentration and mood.”

Tinnitus is thought to be triggered by underlying problems, including diminished hearing due to ageing, earwax, high blood pressure and anxiety, but in many cases the cause is unknown.

There are around seven million sufferers, including children and young people.

“There’s a widespread belief that nothing can be done, when in fact there are a number of effective approaches to therapy,” David says.

“In the last three years, there’s been a major resurgence in research, and several approaches involving drug treatment are being investigated. The possibility of treating tinnitus using magnetic stimulation of the brain has also been tested and seems to be promising. Get an interested and informed medical opinion,” he advises.

“Also, many people benefit from the use of low-level environmental sound. There are many inexpensive devices that allow you to get off to sleep using soothing sounds, like the sound of rain.”

* For more information, visit tinnitus.org.uk or call 0800 0180527.

Every winter my back plays up and I get nagging, uncomfortable pain that makes me miserable and bad tempered. I can’t cope with the thought of more months of discomfort. What can I do?

Barrie Savory, leading osteopath and author of The Good Back Guide, whose celebrated clients include Sean Connery and the Duke of York, says you’re not alone.

“Recurrent winter backs are incredibly common,” he says.

“When the body’s blood circulation slows because of the drop in temperatures, any incipient lower back problem will come to fore and result in aches and pains.

“So exercise is key to increasing the blood supply, which feeds the muscles that support the back. Gentle movement will also improve venous drainage so you get rid of lactic acid and toxins which can silt up the veins and slow blood flow.”

Barrie suggests incorporating back-boosting exercise into your day. Walk up stairs instead of using the lift, or get off the bus one stop earlier than you need so you get a ten-minute or more brisk walk.

“Also, as you stand around, for instance, waiting for a kettle to boil or at a bus stop, then pull in the tummy muscles, hold the pelvic floor as if trying to stop passing water and tighten the buttock muscles. Hold for a minute, relax and repeat several times to help tone the core muscles that support the back.

“Keep the body warm by wearing lots of layers, and a heat therapy product may improve circulation and relieve joint stiffness and muscle spasms.”

* Keep cosy with a Thermacare one-size heat wrap, which can be worn under clothes and costs £5.86 for two wraps (0800 1691700/ thermacare.co.uk).