I'm not going to write a column today. My mind’s not right to give it my best shot.

I know the company pay my wages and expect me to churn out plenty of stories in exchange but I’m sure the boss will understand.

It’s not that I can’t do any work; just that I don’t really want to. At least not today, thank you.

“Start typing or else …”, what can the sports editor mean by that?

I’m only following the example set by those wonderful role models of the Premier League. They down tools from time to time so why can’t we all do the same?

That poor, mistaken Javier Mascherano couldn’t possibly play for Liverpool at Man City the other night because his big, bad club wouldn’t let him run off to Barcelona.

He was miffed because his employers were daring to hold him to a lucrative contract that I’m sure was signed without the use of thumb screws.

But he wasn’t focused and mentally prepared for playing in the biggest game of the weekend live on TV … If that wasn’t ‘ah diddums’ enough for you, along comes the case of Asmir Begovic.

Asmir who, you might ask.

He’s the world famous Stoke goalkeeper. The world famous second choice Stoke goalkeeper, who never gets a game.

Along comes the Carling Cup and his chance for a rare start against Shrewsbury.

But no, Begovic doesn’t want to appear. So he told his manager Tony Pulis exactly that on the morning of the game.

“People have obviously been blowing in his ear,” was the public reaction from Pulis. Clearly, just like Mascherano, Begovic wants out for greener pastures elsewhere.

Having watched Pulis on the touchline, you can only imagine how he responded behind closed doors.

But how do you punish such blatant insolence?

In any other profession, the striking employee would be straight out on his ear (yes boss, I am still writing). But top-flight football is a very different planet.

Both Mascherano and Begovic are worth something. And, as such, must be handled with kid gloves, even if the iron fist inside them is straining to plant a meaty left hook on their pampered jaw.

Liverpool, definitely, cannot afford to write off the multi-million sum they look set to pocket for the petulant Argentine. So they cannot play hard ball with him.

Stoke, to a much lesser degree, are in the same situation with their young goalkeeper.

And, of course, the players – and, more significantly their “people” – know that very well. However bad they behave, the players will still hold all the aces.

Managers and chairmen can huff and puff all they like but that will not change until the Premier League itself changes. Don’t hold your breath for that to happen.

Yesterday, news broke that Mascherano had agreed a four-year deal with the Spanish club, subject to a medical, for a package which is believed to come close to Liverpool’s valuation of £25million.

And by this time next week, I can’t imagine Begovic still being in the same place. The final-day madness of the transfer window will see to that.

He will get his move and these tawdry episodes will blow over. At least until the next time.

Because there will be a next time and another after that and so on until the lunatics are no longer in charge of the asylum.