Ladies and gentlemen, hang out the bunting, book a band and prepare to party because I am delighted to say we have mastered potty training.

It's not earth-shattering news, I know, but if you remember, some weeks back I wrote that we (more our three-year-old daughter) were having a "wee" bit of trouble in making the transition from nappies to potties.

It looks as though all those hours spent putting reward stickers on a chart in our kitchen have at long last paid off as Megan seems to have made such incredible progress in the last couple of weeks that it's got me wondering if we had a problem in the first place.

Well-meaning friends and relations (and, of course, those of you who contacted me - thank you!) stressed that it would happen when she was ready and not to put pressure on either her or myself in the meantime. They were right - it's not easy though is it? And wouldn't life be a lot easier if little 'uns came with a manual?

First-time parents would know, when attempting to give solids or when putting them down for a nap, a quick press of the baby "snooze" button would give them two glorious hours in which to fill their time with pleasures such as loading the washing machine and removing food missiles from the kitchen wall.

It's shame toddlers don't come with a British Summertime re-set button. The clocks go forward one hour but do our offspring adapt? No they don't. I've lost count of the number of times people at work have chirped at me "I LOVE summer - brighter evenings and for the first few weeks it's like having a lie-in."

Really? Come and live at our house, when you can get up even earlier while our toddler tries to draw on your face with a permanent marker before you've woken up enough to defend yourself.

One weekend, my husband Graham was on early duty, and a night out with his mates and a few too many beers had left him drowsy and defenceless as Megan drew a big Emperor Ming moustache on him.

He'd never seen Flash Gordon and after he'd watched it, he wished he hadn't - especially when he popped down to the garage for some bacon. Ask him about it, and he'll say they're an odd bunch down there, obsessed with cleaning floors and the like. Flash! Waa-aa!

If a master-reset button was unavailable, the other button I'd be interested in is a SWS or Selective Wee Stop. This would work for just a limited time and spring into action whenever you and your toddler were passing anywhere with four walls, a roof and a bathroom. Why? Novelty is everything to Megan, and I've told her that if she needs to go she must tell me. In the past week she's felt the sudden urge at Homebase, Morrisons, Currys and more, sometimes there just aren't the facilites available which is when this button would be activated.

Why this urge for selectiveness? Let's just say it involved a trip to a bathroom showroom, a carton of juice and a long car-ride. "Mummy it won't flush!" I heard as my daughter re-appeared around a corner. Shame the same couldn't be said about my face.