Domestic abuse can be all-consuming for victims, whether it is emotional, physical or financial. Those who abuse their loved ones manipulate, bully and torment their victims, so it can feel like there is nothing left of yourself. You lose confidence, hope, and often live in fear, which can be so debilitating. We know from charities who specialise in working with adults experiencing domestic abuse that there could be numerous incidents, even serious injuries before someone has the bravery to say enough is enough and seek help for themselves. How hard that can be, cannot be underestimated.

So, think of the children living in those abusive households, watching loved ones suffer so horrendously - even if they themselves are not the target, they are just as much a victim. It must be heart-breaking to know as a parent that your children are having to live through the horror of domestic abuse. One 13-year-old girl told Childline: "Mum says we can’t use our ‘emergency bags’ until after coronavirus is over”. Even though children are not always the ones to suffer physical harm, they have told Childline they feel trapped and, in some cases, it has led to depression, suicidal thoughts, self-harm, and eating disorders. One 14-year-old boy told Childline: “I really need your help; my dad has been physically abusing my mum. He has an anger problem and it’s getting out of hand. The smallest things make him angry and he starts shouting. I'm terrified of him and I've had enough, I can’t take it anymore - please help me!”

Last week we revealed that contacts to the NSPCC’s helpline about the impact of domestic abuse on children have surged by almost a third since the start of the lockdown, to an average of one an hour. In fact the NSPCC helpline responded to 1,500 contacts about domestic abuse from across the UK between 23 March and 17 May 2020, resulting in 156 referrals being made to local agencies in Yorkshire and the Humber. Shockingly in some cases, fears about the virus were exploited to withhold access to children, cut off contact to family and friends, and monitor victims’ movements under the pretext of keeping them safe from the virus. Victims said this made it difficult to leave and speak out. One mother told our Helpline: “My ex-partner has taken my baby son away from me and I don’t know what to do. He stormed into the house the other day saying he was going to take the baby for a few days – he said he wouldn’t get to see him ‘til the summer cos of the lockdown. When I refused, he pushed me against the wall and took off with the baby and house keys. I’ve not heard from him since and I’m really worried about my baby’s safety.”

It is important for us as a charity to become the voice for the children who can’t speak up for themselves, hidden behind the closed doors of abusive households. For us to show that the increased risks during the crisis further highlight the need for the Government to amend the law to recognise how the daily nightmare of violence and coercive control can impact on children and why they must have access to specialist support to recover. It is truly woeful that the Domestic Abuse Bill, in its current form, fails to do that despite repeated calls from multiple experts, including the Domestic Abuse, Children’s and Victim’s Commissioners, as well as the Home Affairs Select Committee. We also need a statutory duty for local agencies to deliver specialist community-based services for these children to recover.

What are the consequences of this failure? It means our children who really need help and support could slip through the net. In reality, it can mean children being left behind in abusive households. We found in an analysis of Serious Case reviews since 2019 for example that in one case a victim needed to leave her home for her own safety but couldn’t take her child with her and professionals did not consider the risks for the children who were left behind being cared for by the abuser. In another case, a perpetrator of domestic abuse killed their child and themselves during a contact visit after separating from their partner due to physical violence. Lockdown has shone a spotlight on children who are living with the daily nightmare of domestic abuse. None of us, let alone the Government, can afford to turn a blind eye to their plight. If you have concerns about a child please do contact the NSPCC Helpline on 0808 800 5000, you can do so in confidence or email help@nspcc.org.uk