IF MY husband ever asks to help with the ironing or vacuuming, I am going to have to give him a wide berth.

Offering to help with the housework could mean they have an ulterior motive and are after more than a quick thank you.

American Instagram star Bri Dietz recently revealed how her husband Bobby helps with domestic duties so he can ‘get lucky’ - in other words, enjoy favours in the bedroom.

The couple dubbed the unusual arrangement ‘choreplay’, and it - or versions of it - appear to be catching on over here.

A new book, The Secret Life of Husbands, by London -based author Melissa Katsoulis explores the battleground over domestic duties in marriages and cites how ‘choreplay’ cements a couple’s relationship.

For Melissa, choreplay isn’t so much about sex, but more about getting men to do more housework and buttering them up by not criticising the results.

On both counts I don’t like what I’m hearing. Firstly, I’d like to know the rules of choreplay. Does a quick whizz round with the Hoover warrant a peck on the cheek or a long, lingering snog? Would a cuddle be sufficient reward for hanging out the washing? And what about those more arduous tasks such as defrosting the freezer? Would that necessitate a no-holds barred ‘50-Shades of Grey’ scenario?

If this is the future I’ll pass. I’d rather do 100 per cent of the chores myself.

As for holding back criticism, that’s never going to happen. I can’t sit back and watch as my husband piles washed pots so precariously that if someone so much as breathes nearby they go crashing to the floor.

Or when he plucks one shirt - his own - from a huge pile of laundry, irons it, then unplugs the iron and walks away.

What we should be addressing is why, 91 years after getting the vote - we women still have to find incentives to bring an equal balanced to household tasks.

Surely we should be appalled by national newspaper headlines like this recent offering: ‘ Want to perk up your marriage? Try some CHOREPLAY!’

We are not living in the 1950s. Nowadays most women go out to work, but at home we still have to do the lion’s share of housework.

It’s no surprise that, in a survey, the Office for National Statistics found that, when it came to unpaid chores at home, women were doing, on average, almost 40 per cent more than men. These findings are borne out in other studies, including research by a finance company that found women spend double the amount of time on things like cooking, cleaning the kitchen, and vacuuming. They also spend more time on other chores, including grocery shopping, dusting, and washing dishes.

Despite all the ‘new man’ nonsense that was peddled in the 1980s, when men were regaled as heroes for changing nappies, on the domestic front there is still a marked divide between the sexes.

My husband does the bulk of the cooking, which is great, but the core tasks of cleaning, ironing and shopping, always fall to me. I am not claiming to be a domestic goddess - my husband says I am about as domesticated as a wild mustang - but I try.

On weekends, when we are both at home, it’s more a case of chore wars than choreplay as we battle it out as to who does what.

When my husband does help out, however sparkling he leaves the bathroom, however spotless the kitchen floor and however fluff-free the carpet, there is absolutely no reward between the sheets. That I can say for certain.

*While national newspaper pictures of a British four-year-old girl who placed a message in a bottle in Spain, which went all the to Russia, tick all the ‘cute’ boxes, why are we applausing this?

Aren’t we supposed to be trying to rid our oceans of rubbish not add to it?

The report tells of how, with parental approval, the child ‘tossed the bottle into the water at Santa Susanna near Barcelona,’ including a photo of herself, her dad’s mobile number and a note.

Rubbish of any kind is a threat to wildlife as well as a blight on the environment.

If, as a child, I’d tossed rubbish of any kind into the sea my dad would, quite rightly, have exploded. I’d love to know David Attenborough’s views on this highly irresponsible activity.

*I was thrilled a little over a week ago to win an award for this column at the O2 Yorkshire and Humber Media Awards.  As all columnists know writing a column is not an easy task deciding upon subjects every week. Some columns come easily, others are more laboriously put together.

I rarely win anything, not even raffles, and I’ve entered this quite a few times so it was a huge shock to be called up, but a wonderful surprise at the same time. It is a privilege to be allowed to write it every week and good to know that people enjoy it.