Getting the wheels in motion for little Ruby (From Bradford Telegraph and Argus)

Getting the wheels in motion for little Ruby

4:27pm Tuesday 23rd June 2009 in

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Last year Ruby Barnard-Brady’s friends and family gathered to celebrate her birthday, just as they had done the year before.

They played games and tucked into sandwiches, cake and treats, as youngsters normally do at a children’s party, but the notable absence of the birthday girl made it a more sombre occasion.

Four-year-old Ruby died in 2007 within weeks of the diagnosis of a rare and aggressive type of brain tumour which affects around 100 children every year.

Ruby’s father, Matt, says hosting a birthday party for his daughter after her death was surreal at the time, but it helped him and his partner, Lysa Barnard, deal with their devastating loss.

“We had a birthday party for her last year – we had a birthday cake and sang Happy Birthday – and we are having one this year,” says Matt.

Matt says Ruby’s friends weren’t fazed by their friend’s absence. “Having a birthday party is par for the course for them and the children were fine with it. They all released balloons and sent them up to heaven for Ruby,” he says. “It is emotional and you are all over the place. The children are having a good time so it isn’t as horrific – children have a different way of dealing with it and they talk about her.”

Matt says holding the parties enables them to see Ruby’s friends and the other people who shared their little girl’s short life. “It’s seeing everybody again in a big group. Because we haven’t got her with us now, we don’t do things as we did, so it’s nice to see everybody even when she isn’t there,” says Matt.

He and Lysa are gradually coming to terms with their loss, but it still hits them hard. “It’s two years ago now but it is never not in your mind,” says Matt.

When Ruby fell ill, he was embarking on a charity cycle ride from Lands End to John O’Groats to raise funds for prostate cancer research, after a friend had the disease. “Ruby’s voice had changed. We took her to the doctors a few times then she started being sick, but she wasn’t ill,” he says.

Following a family holiday in Portugal, the couple noticed Ruby was losing her balance while walking. They took her to see a hospital specialist. A scan revealed an inoperable tumour, but Matt appreciates that the symptoms are often difficult for doctors to spot, and that an earlier diagnosis wouldn’t have given their little girl a greater chance of survival as the prognosis for this type of tumour is the same.

Ruby died shortly after her first dose of treatment. “She was a lovely, outgoing little girl. She’d recently started school and we, of course, presumed she would be with us forever. The speed at which the tumour took Ruby’s life from her was shocking,” says Matt.

Ruby’s death was the impetus for him taking on the challenge of his life – following the TransAmerica cycle route from Yorktown, Virginia, to Astoria, Oregon, a distance of more than 4,250 miles.

“I have been to New York and San Francisco but I hadn’t been anywhere out of the big cities, so I will see a lot of America I wouldn’t have seen otherwise,” he says.

Matt hopes to raise more than £7,000 for the Samantha Dickson Brain Tumour Trust through his unsupported cycle stint, setting off on July 8, from the east to the west coast of the USA. The Trust raises money to enable more research to be undertaken into the various types of brain tumours.

Matt estimates that the trek will take him 60 days, averaging 75 miles a day. The firefighter, from Bradford, has already had support from family and friends, and Continental Airlines have generously sponsored him by donating his flights.

Matt and Lysa have also set up an umbrella trust within the Samantha Dickson Brain Tumour Trust in Ruby’s memory.

The Ruby Fund enables family and friends to pool their fundraising. Matt’s mum and her friends are planning a ‘Ruby Ball’ which will be held in October at the Ramada Jarvis Hotel, formerly the Bankfield, in Bingley, to raise money and awareness about brain tumours.

“The sooner they do more research, the less likely it is to happen to other people. You don’t want anybody else to go through that,” says Matt. “Hopefully the research will be there to knock the number of cases down. It was just too fast for Ruby.”

• For more information about the Ruby Fund visit braintumourtrust.co.uk/RubyFund.htm.To sponsor Matt visit justgiving.com/mattbrady