A Brit for Kylie? She should be so lucky

As a measure of genuine talent The Brit Awards are about as valid as The Turner Prize is for art and The Booker for novels.

Having seen Kylie Minogue on a recent Jools Holland special on BBC, I'm at a loss to know why any fair-minded judge thinks her worthy of a Brit.

Apart from a smile like a grand piano keyboard and a backside to raise the dead, Kylie doesn't have anything to offer as a performer. She was a rotten actress in Neighbours; as a singer her voice is weak, puling. A boiling kettle is more expressive.

On Jools Holland's show her duos with Sir Paul were embarrassing. Lulu would have done so much better - but she was sidelined after one number.

Surviving an operation for cancer seems to have made Kylie an object of sentimental regard. She may be a wonderful human being and a loving friend; but music prizes are awarded for artistic merit - at least I thought they were.

Shows how dumb I am. After all, when did an artist worthy of the noun last win a Turner?

Nah. Glittering prizes are marketing wheezes.

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