RELATIONSHIPS aren't all hearts and flowers.

While many were buying cards and gifts to woo their loved ones on Valentine's Day today others may have viewed it as a commercial exercise to boost retail sales.

Spontaneous expressions of love are probably far more appreciated at other times of the year rather than on one day, and taking time out of our busy lives to spend time together is worth more than a card on the mantlepiece or a gift to unwrap.

Intimacy can help to keep relationships alive - but with natural changes to our bodies as we age - some may find it more difficult than others.

Sue Makin, sex therapist and supervisor at Relate Bradford, says: "As we are a healthy ageing population and we expect our bodies to function the way they did before being peri menopausal and menopausal; they don't always.

"With a little extra psychosexual support, reminding ourselves of our sensual side, and accepting and embracing our changes we can extend our sexual and sensual lives for life."

According to Relate, people are often surprised by some of the sexual issues that can develop as they get older. They may worry about how these issues will affect their sex life and may develop anxieties surrounding body image, self-confidence, or their identity as a sexual being.

However, the important thing to remember is you are not alone and you are never too old to have a good sexual and sensual relationship.

"Of course there can be hormonal changes that can have both negative and positive effects on men and women as they age. The positive, women no longer have to worry about becoming pregnant and this can be very liberating increasing their interest in sex," explains Sue.

"This can be a shock for some men, if they have been the partner previously initiating sex. Some men may experience erectile dysfunction. Whichever partner experiences a sexual problem, low libido, erectile dysfunction the couple working together can work with the sex therapist to help them improve their sex life and overcome their problems."

With their families fleeing the nest, Sue says during their 50s couples can find being at home together both challenging and exciting.

"You can get to know each other again," says Sue.

And for those with relationship difficulties, help is at hand.

"If your relationship isn't where you want it to be, Relate Bradford have relationship counsellors who can help you and when your relationship is on the right track, come work with our sex therapists if you need to.

"We have both male and female sex therapists in Bradford waiting to help clients move into their next exciting sensual and sexual stage in their lives. There is nothing wrong in asking for a little help - love languages like any forms of communication sometimes need a refresher."

Top tips for keeping your relationship alive:

  • Ensure you have date nights - write your ideas down and put them in a jar. This removes the pressure of deciding what to do. Pull out an idea and have fun!
  • Make time together sensually; don't underestimate what being kind to your partner feels like, and what it feels like when your partner is kind to you.

For more information visit relate.org.uk.