It is not a contest we are accustomed to hearing about - but it's a battle that will be waged more and more in the future, if the results of a survey are to be believed. A quarter of men will, apparently, not date a woman who owns two or more cats.

I find this nothing short of outrageous. This prejudicial attitude towards our feline friends is unacceptable in today's politically correct society.

I think most intelligent women will banish such men from their thoughts, but there is bound to be a minority who, in their hunt for a bloke, take heed of this nonsense and turf out their pets.

For this foolish few, I have compiled a list of the pros and cons of living with both man and cat. It should help them see sense.

Hygiene

Man: Not brilliant. Despite regular showering, rarely cleans up after himself. Leaves hairs all over the place, especially after shaving. Marks out of ten: 3 Cat: Meticulously clean. Contrary to popular belief, leaves very few hairs. Marks out of ten: 9

Toilet habits

Man: Leaves the toilet seat up, and doesn't always hit the target. Marks out of ten: 1 Cat: Cats are fastidious about their toilet habits. They use a litter tray indoors, and those who can leave the house to visit the toilet dig a neat hole in the soil (okay, I admit, that's not great if it's someone else's garden or you've just planted bulbs) and cover it up afterwards. Marks out of ten: 6

Conversation

Man: You may start off with a good bit of banter at the dinner table, but that soon peters out and by the time you reach your three-month anniversary, you're struggling. Come back from work hoping to offload your angst and he won't like it. Marks out of ten: 2 Cat: Those purrs never end. You can moan and groan as much as you like after a hard day, and a cat will always be there to listen. Marks out of ten: 10

Loyalty

Men: Most score highly in this department, forsaking all others. But, like women, some do stray. Marks out of ten: 7 Cats: Sadly, however much they appear to love you, cats are not people. They are animals and their lives are dictated by their stomachs. If someone down the street is serving premium chicken breast, while the best you can offer is cheap tinned rubbish, you might not see you beloved as often. Marks out of ten: 2

Overall, I think it is easy to work out which is the best bet for a long-term, loving relationship. As a footnote, I should add that not all men are anti-cat. Amazingly, some women don't like them either. A third of females who took part in the online survey would avoid men who let cats sleep on their pillows. Are they mad? Those men sound perfect. Or should I say purrfect.